Asking For Help and Being Seen

Last month my roommate and dear friend Erika Watson reached out for help to get out of pain and pay her $50,000.00 massive dental surgery bill in her Great Ask Fundraiser. It has sparked something in me. Erika has been a divine sister and friend to me. She is the kind of friend that always puts you first, is eager to listen and to lift you up. She takes things on with full enthusiasm and always goes the extra mile to support and love the people in her life. She has taught me what it means to be vulnerable and courageous enough to be seen through the good and the bad.

The society we live in is without a doubt fast paced, busy, goal oriented and money driven. It seems sometimes that people are so focused on where they are going and what they are gaining that we have forgotten to stop, share and truly be with the people in our lives in all their unique beauty. I myself am guilty of forgetting to call my family, take the time to talk to my neighbors, give my time to the amazing charities and organizations that help those in need or just simply share my love with those around me and be in total gratitude for this day. The older I grow, the more grateful I become for those people in my life that I can always lean on for strength and who I can count on through thick and thin. I have also realized the importance of being that person, the one who sticks around through the good and bad, the one who fights for others, the one who is willing to be uncomfortable for the sake of making someone else's day. We don't have to do it all alone, in fact we can't do it all alone.

Erika, I love you and I hope that I can be the person that you have been for me.

If you want to contribute to Erika's fundraiser you can do so by investing in your own well being and signing up for a 40 day meditation challenge through her special link. 100% of your investment will go to her. Go here for more info and to sign up:

http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/?af=1394327

If there is someone in your life who might need a little extra support, I encourage you to reach out and let them know you are there. Do not forget the change that one small act of kindness can make.

Love, Nicolette

Are You Rowing or Flowing?

There is a current to life, sometimes smooth and sometimes turbulent but, none the less, ever changing. Heraclitus said "No man can step into the same river twice, for it is not the same river and he is not the same man." Life keeps going as do we. What we have today may be gone tomorrow and what we lack today, tomorrow we may gain. But how do we handle today?

It is true that there are times in life where the best option is to allow everything to fall in place and other times that, well, everything feels like a struggle. So, there are times when we must flow and times when we must row on this ever changing river of life. We row so that we know we have done all we can and we flow so that we can feel the grace of life and allow things to be as they will. Call it fate or destiny which allows things to flow and free will which allows us to row and change our course. How do we know the appropriate time to flow and the appropriate time to row? When do we surrender and when do we fight? Because there is freedom and beauty in both. Only when we are following our hearts will we know which is best suited. It is not always easy to see which is best, we get caught up in our minds, deciding and deciphering and sometimes we do not allow ourselves the dignity to flow or the courage to row. Even worse sometimes we give other people the power to choose for us.

Although one is not better than the other, the appropriate timing for each is important to understand. Are you rowing or flowing and which energy is better suited to your situation? The question can only be answered by you.

Starting From Where You Are

Do you ever feel overwhelmed? Exhausted? Confused? Lost? Hmmmm, ya me too. It happens. In fact, it seems when it feels there is too much to do I want to give up all together..... woe is me, I'll just look away and hope the magic kicks in.... like above when the dishes start to do themselves in the Sword in the Stone, where is Merlin when I need him? Then I can just relax, kick back and let the tough times fix themselves. Cuz the dishes are just the beginning of this girls to do list.

Then I realize I don't have a wizard, if I look away things will not get done, damn. So what now? I think we can all relate to this position. So much to do, you can't decide if you want to scream or fall asleep. I think the best thing to do in this position is to remember you can only start from where you are. Seems simple and logical right? But if you keep this in mind and put one foot in front of the other suddenly things don't seem so overwhelming and before you know it they are done. This is a pretty easy thing to apply to our busy days and our long to do lists but what about when we are overwhelmed with all that life has handed us? As life has a way of doing. When suddenly we are left with too much responsibility, too much heartbreak, too much empty time, too much loss, too much pain, too much of what we never expected and never asked for? Well, the same thing applies, we can only start from where we are and take the appropriate steps to heal and move forward. It's important that we do those two things though and not just let time carry us away, because life will go on but will you go on with it... the way you really want to? Can you honestly judge where you are and do what needs to be done to move on with an open heart, a healthy mind and a connected spirit. We can only start from where we are in this moment, greet the day accepting what has happened and hope for the best in the moments to come. We have to take responsibility for ourselves and do what needs to be done to create the life we desire. So don't waste time berating yourself or your situation, take a deep breath and start from where you are and although the dishes will probably not do themselves life usually throws a little magic our way in the process.

How Much Are You Giving Up for Security?

Secure: fixed or fastened so not to give way, become loose or be lost. Not subject to threat; certain to remain or continue safe and unharmed

We all want life to go by pretty much as planned. For the most part we like things to be predictable and reliable. There is a comfort in the normalcy of this. We know who we are and what we offer, who the people in our lives are and what we mean to each other. So we set things up in the way that they can be most secure. A secure future. Well a wise man once said "Life is what happens to you while you are busy making other plans." That man was Mr. John Lennon. Leave it to the man who said "All you need is love" to speak such simple words of truth. Plan as we may life always seems to have it's way. I agree that it's alluring and perhaps might be best sometimes to take the safe way out. The path that seems to be clear and that most everyone is cheering you on for looks bright and sunny and hard to resist.

But before you head forward stop for a moment and think about what is really in your heart. Are you giving up anything by taking this road? Is the more unknown, dark and twisty road perhaps not easier but more valuable to get to know who you really are and what you really want? The secure path is nearly a sure thing but will it make your inner life light up? The truth is we don't know where either road will lead and all we have is what is right in front of us. Although sometimes we have gone so far down the wrong road it's hard to decipher forward from backwards. How do we know which way to go? The further you have strayed from what you really want the more you will feel like you are putting on a show for everyone and perhaps even yourself. Take a moment to come face to face with what you really want and ask yourself "What am I pretending to not know that I really do know?" and "What will I do now that I know?".

It's nice to know there is a consistency to life, it's great to have security, but if you are giving up who you could be for who you should be well that's no life at all.

We Are Always Whole

You know that feeling when everything is perfect? You couldn't ask for anything else.... everything seems to be just right the way it is in that moment. You know those moments. There is a bubbling over of warmth and joy, a rosy feeling in your cheeks and for a moment you feel complete. You couldn't ask for anything to be different, the hands of the clock seem to stop, but really they don't and in the blink of an eye time has carried us to the next moment where we must search again for this feeling of being fulfilled. So what if I told you you could access that feeling any time you wanted to... that it had nothing to do with what was happening around you but everything to do with what is happening inside you?

Well it's true. The truth is nothing and no one will complete us, we are always whole. That feeling of wholeness is always available to us. So this doesn't mean that we don't go out and create and love and learn.... we just don't depend on anything to give us more meaning than we already had all along. Strange concept right? Isn't that what life is all about? Isn't it about finding the right job, making the right amount of money (more, more please!), meeting the right person, going to the right events, living in the right place? Well ladies and gents it seems we have had it wrong the whole time.... what it is really about... drum roll please..... is being in the right mind state and living life fully from this completeness. Because right now whether you believe it or not you are having that perfect moment..... can you feel it? This is the height of your life, can you feel it? If you can't you are simply just lying to yourself and my advice would be to start looking through a new pair of eyes..... take a walk, call a relative, turn up the music and dance, find a place around you or inside you that you have never explored.... this is your life, you are complete right now.... celebrate a little.

The Thing About Love

The thing about love is it doesn't often look like we think it should, more often raw and exposed than shiny and adorned
The thing about love is the moment you look the other way it sneaks in through your door and takes a seat
The thing about love is it hits you like dawn hits the hills of a new day and offers a fresh chance
The thing about love is it makes us lift our eyebrow and wonder
The thing about love is the part that the movie montage skips over, the in between times
The thing about love is it's inevitability
The thing about love is the dance of wax and wane between two desires and where they collide
The thing about love is we just never know
The thing about love is we can let go of it but it does not let go of us
The thing about love is it is more than we could have ever imagined, more than words can describe.

The Recipe of Your Life

"We are the music makers and we are the dreamers of the dream" ~Willy Wonka

Last night I had a dialogue with myself about all the things I wanted to be different and why they were not changing. Wait just a minute, don't call me crazy, I will bet you you have this conversation with yourself nearly everyday, it just is not conscious. "Why am I doing this job?", "Is this relationship really serving me?", "Why can't I stick to this diet?", "Why didn't I do this before the deadline?". We dialogue all day with ourselves but I actually wrote out this dialogue... like if I came to me for advice what would I say. Long 5 page story short, it came down to one big fat realization. See what I want, and I think what we all want, is the ability to be exactly who we are, have the freedom to do the things that inspire and move us and share it with others. My problem was I could not figure out how to approach my life, my limitations, my everyday grind with the right amount of vigor. Then I thought of something I love to do.... cooking. The reason I love cooking is that it puts me right in the moment, fully experiencing tastes, smells, textures, consistencies and details. There is no judging what is happening, it just is, I add what is needed and keep going till the meal is done. I put all my energy into it and then am able to share the outcome with those around me... so that they literally fully digest what I have created. 

OK, so what if I were to approach every moment of my life like I was cooking? Because that is really what we are doing right? We create ourselves or our stories in every moment so that people around us can learn from it. If I brought the awareness I have when cooking a meal to every action right from that moment in the morning that my consciousness comes back from the dream state I could possibly change everything. If I was willing to fully experience each moment's details for what it was and add what needed to be added to make it the best meal for the day, I thought everything could change. So that is what I decided to do today, it has been phenomenal. This slight shift can open up a whole new energy in our lives. My advice, think of anything you absolutely love doing, think of how you approach it, how you give and receive, the reasons you love it and apply those principles to absolutely everything you do. Try it out for just one day, notice where you resist and where you fall off track, come back to your approach in the moment and see if you will ever go back. 

In every moment we can decide to be great. We are the great chefs preparing the best meal of our career, we are the musicians creating the concert that moves thousands, we are the great ancient poets whose translated writings will provide insight for thousands of years, we are the innovators and artists whose works will be remembered and revered forever, we are the disciplined sculpted dancers on stage sending goose bumps over the skins of our audience, we are the love makers locking limbs with the great invisible unknown, we are the business people creating peaceful, sustainable global conversations that change the world, we are the saints and saviors changing the equilibrium of our planet through our prayers and intentions, we are the environmentalists reaching out and saving the very thing that gives us life, we are the mothers, fathers, sisters and brothers of all of existence. The trick is to remember how to approach every moment knowing this is so.